<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?><rss xmlns:dc="http://purl.org/dc/elements/1.1/" xmlns:content="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/content/" xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom" version="2.0"><channel><title><![CDATA[Vanessa Dekyem]]></title><description><![CDATA[My Site]]></description><link>https://www.vanessadekyem.com/blog</link><generator>RSS for Node</generator><lastBuildDate>Wed, 28 Oct 2026 14:49:08 GMT</lastBuildDate><atom:link href="https://www.vanessadekyem.com/blog-feed.xml" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml"/><item><title><![CDATA[Through Pain, a Heart Must Soften.]]></title><description><![CDATA[A heart of stone will become flesh.]]></description><link>https://www.vanessadekyem.com/post/through-pain-a-heart-must-soften</link><guid isPermaLink="false">6a4ee90651337a1cdbcf8c46</guid><category><![CDATA[Blogs]]></category><pubDate>Thu, 09 Jul 2026 00:22:43 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/679533_28b47c1ec36f4d1f83bafab44a5a8496~mv2.jpg/v1/fit/w_615,h_614,al_c,q_80/file.png" length="0" type="image/png"/><dc:creator>vanessadekyem</dc:creator></item><item><title><![CDATA[Before You Say...]]></title><description><![CDATA[Before you say you want to love me, understand my love is, Glances of my recognition, and touches of my reassurance. It is you asking me a question, and me reminding myself that silence is not meant to be used as a weapon for war rather, a  tool for peace. It is apologies, it is growth. To love me is a dance, It is a, “which tune has Vanessa decided to move to today”? A, “where will the wind blow her tomorrow”? I simply ask that you will learn this dance, or teach me your own. If you are...]]></description><link>https://www.vanessadekyem.com/post/before-you-say</link><guid isPermaLink="false">6a178613e39bc17a59bb424d</guid><pubDate>Tue, 30 Jun 2026 16:14:32 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/679533_02323e0b936c4803ab584d96a2a03037~mv2.jpg/v1/fit/w_736,h_981,al_c,q_80/file.png" length="0" type="image/png"/><dc:creator>vanessadekyem</dc:creator></item><item><title><![CDATA[Avoidant Attachments &#38; God.]]></title><description><![CDATA[Courtesy of Pinterest Attachment styles. Haven’t we heard enough about them yet?! The answer is no! We can’t exhaust them enough actually! The understanding of our attachment styles, and how they were developed has been very beneficial in our inter, and intra- personal relationships. They have played a key role in helping humans understand their behaviors and reactions. Why someone is so distant, why another feels the need to chase when they sense retraction. It helps us to understand not...]]></description><link>https://www.vanessadekyem.com/post/avoidant-attachments-god</link><guid isPermaLink="false">6a132661b883334b04e7e191</guid><category><![CDATA[Blogs]]></category><pubDate>Sun, 24 May 2026 16:26:21 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/679533_dda6378a5a9a4c4caabd08d26b9fe6bb~mv2.jpg/v1/fit/w_736,h_705,al_c,q_80/file.png" length="0" type="image/png"/><dc:creator>vanessadekyem</dc:creator></item><item><title><![CDATA[When It Is God That Is Breaking Your Heart.]]></title><description><![CDATA[This title may sound crazy, yes. Truly, I believe it is just words many are afraid to mutter with their own mouths. This feeling of God breaking your heart is not new to man; David felt it, Jesus felt it, Job, Joseph, Paul, the list goes on. Many Christians wrestle with this feeling. SO, before you throw your stones, take a breath and hold my hands. Let us walk through this together. Carlos Idun-Taiwiah When it feels like God is breaking your heart (emphasis on the word “feels”), and you’re...]]></description><link>https://www.vanessadekyem.com/post/when-it-is-god-that-is-breaking-your-heart</link><guid isPermaLink="false">6a1325b6f3bc0136e518ed58</guid><category><![CDATA[Blogs]]></category><pubDate>Sun, 24 May 2026 16:24:14 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/679533_b81c8f7f47864fa5b5a41aa33aa2dbcf~mv2.jpg/v1/fit/w_682,h_1000,al_c,q_80/file.png" length="0" type="image/png"/><dc:creator>vanessadekyem</dc:creator></item><item><title><![CDATA[Abandonment.]]></title><description><![CDATA[“This is not the time to be silent, please God, I beg of you, spare me this anguish”. (Disclaimer: there is good silence, and there is bad silence. Today I will explore the bad, the silence of abandonment. Hold my hand). Courtesy of Pinterest Silence wages a war against my sanity. It had for a while now but I never allowed myself to confront that truth. I learned to fill the void with distractions, lots of them. So much so that it shielded me from really processing how detrimental it was that...]]></description><link>https://www.vanessadekyem.com/post/abandonment</link><guid isPermaLink="false">6a132507f3bc0136e518ec49</guid><category><![CDATA[Blogs]]></category><pubDate>Sun, 24 May 2026 16:21:18 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/679533_ce6304616af04e0f8491558c3fb5f7b3~mv2.jpg/v1/fit/w_500,h_666,al_c,q_80/file.png" length="0" type="image/png"/><dc:creator>vanessadekyem</dc:creator></item><item><title><![CDATA[A Garden Watered By Your Tears.]]></title><description><![CDATA[“Sometimes God doesn’t calm the storm, He calms us”, and that is the ground many find themselves on. But seeds are planted on this ground, it is safe to cry here. I know it is tempting to pray for God to help you escape the situation you are currently in, I know it feels like war. However, hear me when I say, this isn’t war, this isn’t punishment, this is process. This is purging, this is growing, this is breaking, and yes it is uncomfortable. That is why I beg of you to cry. Please cry some...]]></description><link>https://www.vanessadekyem.com/post/a-garden-watered-by-your-tears</link><guid isPermaLink="false">6a1324b2b883334b04e7dea8</guid><category><![CDATA[Blogs]]></category><pubDate>Sun, 24 May 2026 16:18:30 GMT</pubDate><dc:creator>vanessadekyem</dc:creator></item><item><title><![CDATA[Dear God, I think I Broke His Heart.]]></title><description><![CDATA[He was the sweetest thing, no, he is the sweetest thing. Courtesy of Pinterest I speak in present tense because within me, my mind still plays scenes of a world in which I had not done this. He trusted me to keep and tend to something so precious, so fragile, so beautiful. A piece of him that had been hurt before. His heart he entrusted in my hands. My hands, Jaggedly framed, rough, from this journey called life. My hands that failed to hold his heart with grace. He was a sweet fragrance in...]]></description><link>https://www.vanessadekyem.com/post/dear-god-i-think-i-broke-his-heart</link><guid isPermaLink="false">6a13243ba2438924d1117062</guid><category><![CDATA[Blogs]]></category><pubDate>Sun, 24 May 2026 16:17:02 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/679533_0e9db5877bcc43a98220fdd3a00011d5~mv2.jpg/v1/fit/w_736,h_443,al_c,q_80/file.png" length="0" type="image/png"/><dc:creator>vanessadekyem</dc:creator></item><item><title><![CDATA["God I Am Not One of Your Strongest Soldiers" Yeah, We Can Tell.]]></title><description><![CDATA[You keep telling God you are not one of His strongest soldiers, trust me, we all can tell. It’s actually very obvious. But, I promise I am not harsh, I am actually speaking to myself too. So bear with me, hold my hand, let’s walk through this together. Spiritual warfare, what exactly is it? It is the constant battle between the forces of evil, and the children of God. A battle that sometimes is hard to put a finger on, a battle that is unseen. “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood,...]]></description><link>https://www.vanessadekyem.com/post/god-i-am-not-one-of-your-strongest-soldiers-yeah-we-can-tell</link><guid isPermaLink="false">6a13237c996c7eef50782970</guid><category><![CDATA[Blogs]]></category><pubDate>Sun, 24 May 2026 16:14:48 GMT</pubDate><dc:creator>vanessadekyem</dc:creator></item><item><title><![CDATA[The Eldest Daughter's Reflection Is Her Own Father.]]></title><description><![CDATA[“You are just like your father”, my mom stated jokingly after we had gotten into a small disagreement about my temperament. Mom has a way of saying things that get beneath the skin and sizzle until you smell the scent of burning flesh. She aslo has this certain obliviousness, shall we call it (truly, it is just a lack of accountability over the words that come out of her mouth), when it comes to how offensive her jokes can be at times. I know she doesn't mean to, it probably just gets to me...]]></description><link>https://www.vanessadekyem.com/post/the-eldest-daughter-s-reflection-is-her-own-father</link><guid isPermaLink="false">6a1322e6a2438924d1116e3b</guid><category><![CDATA[Blogs]]></category><pubDate>Sun, 24 May 2026 16:11:26 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/679533_02af049309994dab9a036285cfe65e01~mv2.jpg/v1/fit/w_650,h_330,al_c,q_80/file.png" length="0" type="image/png"/><dc:creator>vanessadekyem</dc:creator></item><item><title><![CDATA[Mysterious Girl Era? How About No.]]></title><description><![CDATA[Courtesy of Pinterest Honestly, the yearning and chase to arrive at a place where you can self-proclaim yourself as “mysterious” reeks of desperation. It is inauthentic, manufactured, and self-abnegating. A locking of self within a prison that no one called you to. Those who are innately mysterious are not this calculative of their moves, this manipulative of their image, this denying of themselves. They are just mysterious. What is it about yourself that you dislike so bad, that you’ve been...]]></description><link>https://www.vanessadekyem.com/post/mysterious-girl-era-how-about-no</link><guid isPermaLink="false">6a13226bd681fe01d1665e02</guid><category><![CDATA[Blogs]]></category><pubDate>Sun, 24 May 2026 16:09:08 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/679533_1defadf3524a4c3b89891199c374c966~mv2.jpg/v1/fit/w_1000,h_898,al_c,q_80/file.png" length="0" type="image/png"/><dc:creator>vanessadekyem</dc:creator></item><item><title><![CDATA[A Woman &#38; Her Desire For Control.]]></title><description><![CDATA[God, what do I do with this deep desire for control that resides in me? As a woman, I have been told that it is wrong to feel such emotions. I try to silence it, to keep it tucked away deep within my soul, I promise I do. But, without my permission, it leaks out of me, making itself known in the most undesirable times. I have thought that maybe if I keep this desire fed, maybe then it will be tamed. I was wrong, the more I feed it with my denial, the stronger it grows. I have tried to keep it...]]></description><link>https://www.vanessadekyem.com/post/a-woman-her-desire-for-control</link><guid isPermaLink="false">6a132209b883334b04e7da13</guid><category><![CDATA[Blogs]]></category><pubDate>Sun, 24 May 2026 16:07:13 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/679533_fada1d91d62f4cd69f5cb2eaa2edbee0~mv2.jpg/v1/fit/w_736,h_414,al_c,q_80/file.png" length="0" type="image/png"/><dc:creator>vanessadekyem</dc:creator></item><item><title><![CDATA[I Have Never Loved Love.]]></title><description><![CDATA[I have never loved love. For as long as I can remember, I felt as if something was wrong with me. That while others were in a haste to find their happily- ever- after, others broken by the ripping of their hearts after a break- up, contemplating whether they should give love another chance, there I stood, confused. I just couldn’t grasp it. What was so great about love, and why couldn’t I feel it? It was never anything that concerned me enough to talk about. I was able to intellectualize...]]></description><link>https://www.vanessadekyem.com/post/i-have-never-loved-love</link><guid isPermaLink="false">6a13217ab883334b04e7d90f</guid><category><![CDATA[Blogs]]></category><pubDate>Sun, 24 May 2026 16:05:23 GMT</pubDate><dc:creator>vanessadekyem</dc:creator></item><item><title><![CDATA[You Are Insecure &#38; Here Is Why.]]></title><description><![CDATA[Simply put, you are insecure because you are thinking about yourself too much. Before you get upset, before you click off, take a second to let that sink in. There is a quote from David Foster Wallace that reads, “there’s a lot of narcissim in self- hatred”. I couldn’t agree more. Self- obsession and self- hatred exist in tandem. One can only find things to hate about themselves, if all they see is themselves. I know that may be hard to believe but, if you truly ponder it, the evidence is...]]></description><link>https://www.vanessadekyem.com/post/you-are-insecure-here-is-why</link><guid isPermaLink="false">6a132064deffa7abe5a1ef65</guid><category><![CDATA[Blogs]]></category><pubDate>Sun, 24 May 2026 16:03:16 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/679533_9ad8b056b32041038672fb426f1db90f~mv2.jpg/v1/fit/w_735,h_994,al_c,q_80/file.png" length="0" type="image/png"/><dc:creator>vanessadekyem</dc:creator></item></channel></rss>